How to Visit Europe and Get Famous

 | Dec 27, 2011 | 9:30 AM EST  | Comments
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The holiday period for 2011 is dwindling down, but those looking sharp about it are already planning for time off in 2012.

Employers are recommending you stake your claim to popular vacation times and travel site are promoting great deals if you book well in advance.

But I'm surprised that the tourist industry isn't promoting austerity vacations more. Europe seems the go-to destination to take advantage of poor fiscal planning.

And it goes beyond the great deals on hotels and restaurants you can get from countries like Greece and Italy, which rely so heavily on tourist money and are facing an unprecedented cull in domestic consumer and government spending. Those who like big-risk investments and are betting on the end of single currency should time their travel for when the first country exits the euro.

First of all, days before the collapse you're bound to get more euros for your dollar. Somehow even with the future of the currency in doubt the dollar still can't get parity, but with a default imminent you should get more baklava for your buck.

Second, get a deal for a one-way flight and bet on border closures. At-risk countries could close borders and ground flights to prevent the flight of capital, figuratively and literally. Right now governments like the UK are making contingency plans to rescue ex-pats and vacationers from border closures if the euro disappears. That means free cruises or flights home, via some other fun countries. If you think about it, there's never a stigma about people who have to be bailed out of hotspots. They're always hailed as patriotic heroes returning home from a harrowing foreign land.

Third, make sure you have ample ways to charge your smartphone. Your Tweets about being stranded in a collapsing West could be the ticket for your 15 minutes and likely to be used ad nauseum by lazy journalists looking for easy quotes.

Fourth, translate that quick fame and newfound Twitter following into a book deal about your ordeal called "The Accidental Refugee" and hit the talk-show circuit.

Repeat as needed after each ECB bailout.

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